Thursday, December 8, 2011

With a smile about jealousy.


The ship was wrecked and drowned. Miraculously escaped the man (his last legs) swims up to the secluded island ... . On the island he is met by his wife ... also miraculously escaped:
- And where have you wandered the whole day? The steamer sank yesterday!


When I get home at night, my wife says nothing but furious looks at his watch.
- You still out of luck! - Exclaims the man. - My look at the calendar.

A woman in a private detective agency:
  - I want you to follow my husband and this woman, day and night and finally figured out ... what she found in him???

- If you're going to stick to our maid - wife says to her husband - I divorce you!
  - oh, only because of such a trifle?
  - Remember once and for all: I always find such a man as you, but
never - such a good maid !

 Husband came home with a red stripe on the forehead.
- Lipstick! - Choked with anger, his wife.
- No, the blood. On the way home the accident occurred, and I smashed my head on the steering wheel.
- Well, your happiness, if so!


The dying man tells his wife:
  - Perhaps you have been faithful to me all my life, and, perhaps, sinned? Now, when I die, can you admit that you cheated on me with a neighbor. Now it anyway, but I would like to know the truth before i died.
- What if you do not die? - Sarcastically asked his wife.


A candidate for parliament in the elections in Brazil received three votes.
- One of your voice, the second - is mine, and whose third? - Angrily asks his wife. - I have long suspected that you have another woman.


Wife left her husband. But soon she returned, repents and asks forgiveness.
Husband: -
I'll forgive you for the fact that you left  me,  but for the fact that you back - NEVER!!!

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